I just got a smart phone back in December, and I was finally able to start using it at the beginning of the month. Having a smart phone has made my life easier. I can now just tell Google: "grumpy cat" and it will look up hundreds of images of that cute little furball, and deliver them right to my phone. Only sometimes it gets confused and thinks I said, "crumpled bat," and I don't really want to see any pics of that guy.
Another way my phone has misunderstood me is via Swype. I used to make fun of people who sent weird typos or strange words in texts, but now I get it. I get it like pie.
I have no idea what that meant.
Anyway, to do what I do best, turn awkwardness into hilarity, I'm going to Swype out a mundane story and NOT correct the mistakes that autocorrect corrected. Does that make sense? I don't know. But I hope this will be funny. And not too inappropriate. Because autocorrect sure seems to like being naughty. Here goes:
A Trip to Walmart by Socially Awkward Girl:
One day I went yo Walmart to buy syne stuff. I was out of Shani and conditioner. I also needed syne deodorant because I was out and sometimes I sumo. I also needed see food because reading is fun and kind of impotent if you d want to nut fur.
So I went to get my Tuileries, and there in the middle of the agile was a skiing cat. I couldn't get asking the shopping cat. it Furth have anything in it, but I thought it might belong to someone ego also wanted to but deodorant. I tried, but my cart was too wide to get stringy the other shopping cart.
I was nervous. I looked both ways, Hong no one would see Mt move the song carry. What if someone had pt an alarm on it and it aster being in the mogul of the sir? I would be do embarrassed. But I was bold and brave enough to rich that cart and I nudged it or of the wast. No one even knew the stiffened.
It then leaned down to get my deodorant and realized they were out. So I Sigurd if just be stinky fur a wholly.
Then I went to get my shampoo, and three was a least there reading the label and I coign Getty pray her. I Bede the same stamp she was looking at. I waited a bit, but fired it was to much terrible, and I fled the aisle before she cod talk to me or emerging equally scary.
Them I went to get food. I got stunt you're and some peruse and see surface and Dunne pirates. The latex were particularly fresh.
I didn't get any salad because UT looked beige. And I was or of shag dressing and didn't think about buying any mute.
Then I guy syne I've cream, because I like ice can.
I went to the self checkout to avoid taking to puerile, but the machine went crazy and the annoyed checkout dude had to come help me. Really, I just let him scam my items fir Mr, which was naturally like I had give to a deviously checkout Kane in the first paddle. But I didn't.
Then I took my groceries home and put them in the Grieg. All except fit the I've crash. That I are with a soon dyestuffdrum the creation.
Then I webby r sheep braids the asterisk intersection Weir me out.
The end.
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