My roommate and I have a neighbor who lives in the apartment directly above us. He is a very nice elderly gentelman who just happens to only have one arm. He lost one of his arms as a teenager in some kind of farming accident. Sometimes my roommate and I jokingly call him "The Man Upstairs."
One day "The Man Upstairs" was outside carrying things from his van to the front door of my building. He was struggling somewhat with all the things he was carrying, mainly because he only had one arm with which to carry it. I was getting out of my car and I thought he might need some help.
There were many things I could have said to express my desire to help this elderly, one-armed gentleman. The thing that I said was probably the worst possible thing I could have said to express my desire to help this elderly, one-armed gentleman.
Loudly, I exclaimed, "Sir, do you need a HAND!?"
As the last word came out of my mouth, the horror of what I had said rushed over me. I'm only completely sure the realization of what I said was apparent from the expression on my face. "The Man Upstairs" smiled at me and politely declined my help. I entered my apartment as quickly as I could and wallowed in my utter embarassment.
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